Home > cultural commentary > Faith in human nature?

Faith in human nature?

We recently bought a new campervan – well, not exactly new, it’s almost 20 years old.  So we decided to sell our old one, which is smaller and now 10 years old.

This has resulted in a string of people turning up to look at it.

This has become rather tedious, because according to the visitors it has severe rust (yes, it has some but it’s cosmetic). It also has severely corroded brakes, a master brake valve that’s leaking (the ‘evidence’ is there’s some oldish insulation on it), a broken suspension, illegal tyres (they’ve all been replaced recently), and numerous other major faults including the plastic end caps on the side body trim – which cost about 70p or $1 each – being  too old. Oh, and someone told us in all seriousness that the wheels are ‘too round’.

About two-thirds of the people who’ve turned up only want to use it to do ‘fishing trips’. What they want to use it for doesn’t really matter to us; and it doesn’t explain why when a pair of them turn up they discuss how much profit they can make when they resell it. Nor does it jive well with them having trade plates in the back of their car, which are only used by motor traders.

Some have tried to bargain on the basis that it will cost them money to take it to a garage to get X, Y and Z fixed. But then they let slip that actually they are mechanics.

Several have claimed to only be passing through, and live 50 or more miles away. They make a one-time offer based on the fact they won’t be passing by our door again. So why are they driving a company van that usually has a local business name and phone number on it?

One went as far as claiming the inside of the van was damp and would take major repair. He ‘proved’ this by bringing a ‘damp meter’ out of his car and showing us the needle flicking into the red when he touched probes to some interior metalwork. It spoiled the illusion that the gauge on the meter went to 12 volts – in other words it was just an electrical multimeter that demonstrates metal can conduct electricity, and he wouldn’t take his hand off the front of the meter to show it to us.

So my conclusion is there are a lot of people out there prepared to lie and some who will play tricks to try to get things cheap. Which is not, I suppose, a very earth-shattering insight. I’m not any more cynical now than I was before (I always was cynical) but the experience of having to deal with this stuff on a daily basis for the last couple of weeks has proven just a little wearing. I’m just glad I don’t buy and sell old vehicles for a living, and I don’t have to get used to it as a long-term issue. Even though we still need to sell the van.

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  1. September 8, 2013 at 1:05 pm

    This post is loaded with comedy gold…well, at your expense of course. But I’ll send you an email with more of my thoughts.

  2. September 8, 2013 at 4:14 pm

    Thanks for the comment – yes, I guess I could write something that’s more intentionally comic about this sometime, or even pitch it as a short film… In the meantime, the son, or nephew, or some other relation of people who made us a derisory offer turned up yesterday and offered us even less money than they had. And I’ve just costed out some of the major components to see what we could get if we sold them separately, and it comes to around double the value we’ve so far been offered on the van as a road-going vehicle. So that remains an option.

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